At the Inn on Cheat River
I know you are on your way to meet me at the Inn on cheat river
And I’m coming down to meet you again at the Inn on cheat river
I’ll see you again at the Inn on cheat river
You looked at me to convey I was acting like a clown, branded me with a clownish look, I Dipped my eyes, was I ashamed? I felt nothing, and went on
I could not tell you how conflicted I was by the unfruitfulness
The incongruency by whatever standards I had, however related by blood we were
That though we always assumed we would play and dream together,
I was exhausted
I do not even know why I left you like I did
Not even capable of mouthing the words you would never hear
Nor of taking your phone call to ask me why, perhaps to say you still loved me
But as it was Jesus that stood between us, knowing too, someday you’d forgive me
And where the river still flows and sparkles in the moonlight we’ll meet again where laughter And music emanate from under patio lights where intertwined now with weeds and old boards Are only shards left of the Inn on cheat river
I know you are on your way to meet me at the Inn on cheat river
And I’m coming down to meet you again at the Inn on cheat river
I’ll see you again at the Inn on cheat river
You looked at me with resentment and contempt, I was tired of having to deal with it, even
As you tried to block and defeat me, I ignored and deflected it
I could not tell you how hard it was to put up with your manipulations the
Backstabbing and button pushing by whatever reason, however related we were as siblings
We assumed we’d always grow and be together, but finally
I was disgusted
I do not even know why I ghosted you like I did
Not even capable enough to say the words you would never hear
Nor had I courage enough to tell you why, or say I still loved you and even
Had I said it, that we could mend our differences, you would’ve never listened
But the water still flows over riffles in the starlight and we’ll meet again as subtle breezes
Issue above the candlelight where disheveled with creepers and sagging beams are left now
Only ruins of the Inn on cheat river
I know you are on your way to meet me at the Inn on cheat river
And I’m coming down to meet you again at the Inn on cheat river
I’ll see you again at the Inn on cheat river
You had stopped looking at me, only talking sideways, making remarks of disgust, was
It disgust for yourself I wondered, and I tried not to notice it
However unintentional or unknowing, it was disappointing to have to deal with
Your condescension and gradual arrogance, we were friends assumed we’d always be together But to have to think of any more such friendship was dissuading, and
I was bitter
I do not even know why I avoided you like I did
Not even capable enough to hear out your grievance
Nor with courage enough to suggest amends, or tell you I still cared
Even so, if I thought I had reason, too much time and distance was there
But the water still shines like diamonds on this summer night where the ghosts are assembled Now and as the river flows incessantly we dine over atonement and reconciliation that lie amid The rubble and what remains of the Inn on cheat river
Black Stillness of Night
Loud random crackling of a forest of trees falling
Onto the surface of a restless torment
That receives each blow in agony that
Shouts its distress at the black stillness of night
Incessant drone of a thousand frogs chirping
Relentless whine of a thousand blades turning
Unstoppable force of a thousand winds blowing
Scream at the black stillness of night then
Fixed with a thousand curses
Bound by a thousand burdens
Drained of a thousand joys
Went I
Into that murky black vault
With breath extinguished
To wail same forever in eternal silence
At the black stillness of night
Canon
Like a river once pain swollen with worry anxiety and regret I ran high and white swirling into obstacles breaking loud and swift in a torrent of angst unease and fear spending a lifetime banging on boulders that never budged, I found myself drowning in a current of confusion, unable to wriggle free from its cold dead grip not knowing any longer who I was or what I wanted when surrendering my soul I let myself flow peacefully calm and serene shrouded in a misty awareness to let life form of its own with no memories, no goals, or any plans along a path of least resistance like a river now is my mantra my manifestation of a new tranquility, where I course over every impediment in a quiet stillness not caring where I go, inured to where and when if ever I arrive.
Like a river, I position myself as a fish does passively in calm waters, let the current bring me food.
Finding work life balance, aligning life with values and beliefs, goal setting, having a plan, fitting it all into some sort of rigid restrictive and restraining template, or unified philosophy that guides every action and behavior is bullshit.
I take a metaphorical rake now and weed that crap from my life.
With no need to develop intricate, convoluted methods for solving problems I trust that like the pieces of a puzzle everything will inevitably and eventually fall into place.
Realizing that achieving a goal was as ephemeral as realizing a dream, once I had it nothing changed, it slipped through my fingers like sand as I became complacent again and reached for another handful of grit and gravel a new dream, another goal.
Having jettisoned gods, dreams and goals to be ever present on the journey constantly unfolding in front of me, no longer do I tell about the past nor ask about the future, like a clay vessel spinning upon a potter’s wheel, I let the invisible hands of the universe mold me into whatever it expects me to be.
*****
David Summerfield’s fiction, nonfiction, poetry, and photo-art has appeared in numerous literary magazines/journals/ and reviews. He’s been a 2024 finalist for the Northwind Writing Award in nonfiction sponsored by Raw Earth Ink, and 2025 digital art finalist for the virtual exhibition entitled ‘Secret Garden’ sponsored by Ten Moir Gallery. View his work at davidsummerfieldcreates.com.
